One of the greatest virtues of a Midwest childhood is a Midwest education. The heartland teaches its children many valuable lessons and instills strong character. Possibly the single most useful thing I ever had to study growing up in middle America was how to dissect an owl pellet. Today, we are going to share this useful knowledge with you and also take yet another look at owl tattoos, because who doesn’t love owl tattoos?
Owl pellets are, of course, masses of undigested food that are barfed up by owls. I must have had to dissect them around 15 or 20 times as a boy. The dissection of owl pellets can tell us a great many useful things, but all of them only pertaining to what an owl had to eat. It is an invaluable skill to posses.
I cannot even begin to count how many times I’ve used this skill in the real world. Once, I drove into a ditch and didn’t have the cash or AAA for a tow truck. Luckily, the local tow truck driver agreed to get me out in exchange for dissecting some owl pellets so he could figure out what the owl in his backyard had been eating. I got into my fraternity in college by impressing the brothers by dissecting some owl pellets so they could figure out what an owl had been eating. And I really wooed my current girlfriend on our first date by dissecting some owl pellets so she could figure out what an owl had been eating.
Let us now share with you the secrets to owl pellet dissection… You want to obtain an owl pellet and carefully pull or cut it apart and look for tiny bones and identify them. How will you know how to identify these bones? They will be mouse bones, because it’s always fucking mice.
Now that you possess this ancient knowledge, take a look at these owl tattoos and imagine rooting around in their hairy vomit.
Don’t these owl tattoos make you want to dissect some owl pellets right this instant? Well, wherever you may be in the world, you can do just that, thanks to the magic of this virtual owl pellet dissection website!