Root Beer Tattoos Because Regular Sodas Suck

Root Beer Tattoos Because Regular Sodas Suck

We’re getting to the literal root of one of our favorite beverages

Today we’re looking at root beer tattoos, if for no better reason than I had some with my lunch. Root beer is a cherished American drink that dates back to the 19th century. Long before then, Native Americans enjoyed beverages made from the sassafras root, which were precursors to commercial root beers, which would first be sold around 1875. These days, the market landscape is dominated by Barqs, Mug, and A&W, though there are hundreds of craft root beer brands for the true connoisseur.

Traditionally, root beer is made by using either sassafras roots or sarsaparilla for its main flavoring agent. These two ingredients are sourced from sassafras trees and the vine Smilax ornata, respectively. However, in the US the FDA has banned sassafras because a part of its make-up, safrole, has been found to be carcinogenic. This means that most commercial root beers rely on sarsaparilla, though some have started using a safrole-free sassafras extract. Say that three times fast.

Root beer is naturally caffeine free, but caffeine can be added later. Why you would adulterate it like that, we don’t even know. Though root beer can be alcoholic, we’ve never had an adult root beer that doesn’t taste like shit. We recommend you stick to the good stuff. The tasty beverage also has the distinction of being one of the few drinks that can be both carbonated and non-carbonated.

And root beer’s not just great for drinking, try throwing some ice cream into a mug of it. Or better yet, pour some root beer over some ice cream that’s already in a mug to avoid splatter. This is an exotic concoction known colloquially as a “root beer float.”

Today, we’ve poured you a tall frosty glass of root beer tattoos to gulp down with your eyes. There are some hardcore root beer drinkers out there, and we’ve got a selection of some of their skin on display. Just for you. Because we love you and because it’s our job. Because it’s our job to love you.

Don’t these root beer tattoos just make you thirsty for, oh I dunno, say… Some root beer? Why not go get some. This isn’t sponsored content from the big root beer companies, but it is a trial effort in hopes of pitching a larger campaign that culminates with perpetual kegs of free root beer in our office. Remember kids, play the long game.

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