We’ll begin this article with a simple note from your humble editor (and author of this here article) — grandpa is gonna get on his soapbox for a bit and yell at you to stay off his figurative lawn. So if you aren’t looking to hear a grumpy man unload all of his grumpitude for the next 400 words I recommend looking at the pretty pictures, clicking share, and moving on.
Now that we’ve gotten that out of the way, what the fuck is the deal with all these American Psycho tattoos? To be clear, I’m not shitting on the artistry of them, these are beautifully done tattoos created by phenomenal artists. I’m asking why anyone would want to get Patrick Bateman, or one of his catchphrases, on their body for the rest of their lives. Every single element of his character is repulsive, by design when Bret Easton Ellis created him, and yet people are getting his visage tattooed on them and it just seems really silly to me.
Lets leave all the killing aside for a moment, cause I get the idea of having a killer from a movie tattooed on you. Darth Vader is the classic personification of evil, Hannibal Lecter is an entertaining genius, and Freddy Kreuger just looks like a motherfucking badass. They are clearly fictitious entities, whereas Bateman hits far closer to home.
Bateman represents everything negative about America’s consumerist culture of the 1980s (and beyond), and his murderous psychosis comes out of his unhealthy obsessions. His constant drive to obtain more money and more status is disgusting. His reaction to never getting a dinner reservation at Dorsia may be a moment of levity in the film, but in reality it shows what a sickening and revolting person he is on the inside. Can we talk about the way he treats his fiancee? I guess I would accept his behavior if he was trying to listen to something good, but shutting her down to listen to Simply Fucking Irresistible by Robert Fucking Palmer? What an asshole. And the argument with the poor dry cleaner? I see people like that every day in New York and they make me sick.
Even if Bateman never murdered a single person (and there’s argument about whether or not he did) he would still be by far the least likeable character in the book/film. So why would you want to wear his image on your body forever? This isn’t some cool anti-hero that at least has his heart in the right place but uses questionable tactics (like The Punisher for example), Bateman is an abomination of a human being that does horrific things for seemingly no reason other than his own glorification.
Of course, all this being said, the tattoos look amazing. And it might be kinda funny and rad to get a tattoo of Paul Allen’s business card or a tribute to Dorsia. But a realistic portrait of Patrick Bateman? No thank you.
Think I’m wrong? Upload your own tattoo of Bateman to the Tattoodo app and explain your rationale with the #AmericanPyscho.